Mail Buddy No More
by Suzumiya Yuki
Summary: [Renna x Shinon] A Starship Operators Fic What should've happened after Renna was shot.


**Mail Buddy...No More.**

_By Demon Eyes_

Disclaimer: Err…Please don't sue me. I just borrowed the characters.

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_Dear Shinon, by the time you read this, I will have either been careless enough to be killed or I am simply to my limits and have decided to tell you the truth about me._

_You're the wisest person I've ever met so you might have realised at least a little that I am not who I seem to be. I don't think you naïve or stupid if you never debated it. You are just that kind of person. _

_Before all that, let me get to the point of things. _

_I am not the girl that you or everyone else on this ship, think I am. I feel weird saying this but I am actually, a spy. Right before our Academy years I was not one of you - Not really. It might not change anything either but I wasn't involved in any of the sabotages that we have been experiencing recently. My plans were bigger. Not really my plans but you know what I mean. _

_The mission was set to commence a months of earth time ago but there is where I think things get a little complicated. I was supposed to report back to my superiors a week before the set date to confirm the flow of things but I didn't. I couldn't. Not after everything that had happened. _

_If I were to sum up all those things that made me hold back would be...you, Shinon._

_We may never have talked person to person, gone out to coffee or even just shook hands but you were closer to me than none other. Ever since that fateful day when you sent me my first mail, (by the way, I still have it properly encrypted) my life and even me myself, have been repeatedly changing, all because of you. _

_If I were to show you a picture of me before we first met, you would laugh at me telling me that it was my evil twin or something like that. I was trained to be the perfect spy ever since I can remember. I took my first life when I was only six years old. My orders were to act as a normal student when I was sent into the academy and I will tell you, it was super hard. Imagine me, a person who had never smiled, to train for only two weeks to show emotions. My psychiatrist got a Nobel for his success I tell ya. _

_All those smiles, all those emotions were fake – a façade. Developed to fool all but believe me when I tell you that it hasn't been all fake recently. Even I can't really tell when I started really smiling for the sake of happiness. I am most aware though that it hard 100 to do with your mails. They brought out the emotions from me. _

_You gave me a 'heart' and you are the reason that I am the person I am right now. _

_And with the emotions also came something else I had only read about in your stories. Something that I never believed existed until now. _

_You made me feel loved. _

_It was strange at first but then after countless times of fighting it and it becoming stronger and stronger, I decided to let them over take me. Every time I read your mils, I found it harder not to walk right up to you and talk to you...in person. I would wake up way before my usual time just to catch you when you entered the dining hall. It was only a few days ago that it really came to me._

_I have feelings for you Shinon. _

_It was most definitely not the right time to make that discovery and as such, when my superiors contacted me, all I did was hung up on them. I had thought I had the mission in the bag but everything really changed a week ago. _

_That night sleep eluded me. I kept being forced to think of the future – My future...with you in it. As it goes, thinking of the future always brings back the past and I never knew a person could be a un-decisive as I was at that moment. _

_It's really funny. Just when I had decided to come face to face with you and properly apologise to you...and everyone else, this goes and happen. I write this right before we go to the surface for supplies and the negotiations. I have a feeling...One that we spies always have when you were about to go on your last mission, right now. _

_I may not come back and that is why I write this. Just in case anything happens to me. If and I mean if I get out of this alive, I plan to step up to you Shino and have our first ever face to face conversation - Started with a heartfelt apology from me. _

_I love you Shinon._

_It is my only wish I've ever had that you find it in you to forgive me._

_With love,_

_Renna._

Tears were running freely now down Shinon's cheeks. She was on the shuttle taking her back to their Cruiser with her three fellow officers. The other women in the gloomy atmosphere stayed silent for they had also heard the news of Renna being short when she confronted guards in the air locks. They were also aware of Shino's relationship with Renna even though the two never really talked person to person. They were great friends and many times, whenever Shinon got scolded in their training, she would quickly message Renna who in turn quickly sent her a consoling reply. The two even went as far as to inspire more crew members to try out the mail buddy system and it worked.

Many guys and girls got dates from that way of connectivity. Just a few more minutes of nothing but silence and the humming of the ship, the shuttle landed in the cargo bay and no one was surprised when the ever composed Shinon all but ran for the emergency rooms.

Renna was currently in surgery and the physicians were fighting tooth and nail to remove the three bullets in the girl's body but things were not looking very good, as Shinon noticed when she hit the white room. There was a girl crying uncontrollably on the floor by the door way but Shinon paid her no heed. She unconsciously knew that it was the one that was with Renna when she was shot. The doctors had just finished their task ad were taking off their bloodied clothes.

"We did all we could Ma'am - Now all we can do is to wait. At this moment, her life is in her own hands. She is in a coma and we can't do anything about that." One of them finished with a shake of his head.

The other decided t put some pressure off his co-worker. "In this state, it is always up to the patient to decide if they live on. I know this young lady here and I am positive that she will pull through." He spared a side glance at the wired up Renna in the bed. Some times prayers help too." He offered.

"Thank you very much. Is it okay if I stay with her for a while please?" Shinon'eyes eyes had never left Renna's form since she arrived. The two men exchanged glances and nodded understandably.

"We don't mind at this stage. In fact, it is recommended that patients in the same state have someone talk to hem. It has been proven that more than 80 of comatose patients come back when they have outside connections." The speaker let a genuine smile come to his lips.

Shinon only nodded her head to them without turning around. She heard them helping the girl to her feet and closing the doors behind them as they left. When she was alone, Shino let the tears over take her again as she un ceremoniously fell to her knees beside the occupied bed. She carefully held the arm that was free of the IV drip and pressed it to her cheek. She let her soul free through the tears as if willing it to reach the woman in the bed before her. She wept and wept and it was nothing like the woman who was always hard faced and composed. Were any of the other crew members to see her at that moments, they would mistake her for someone lese. As it was, no on except the sleeping Renna was in the proximity. Silently crying out Renna's name, Shinon fell asleep there where she was. The events of the day had been very exhausting and she never thought crying would take so much moiré from a person.

The uncomfortable position in which she had fallen asleep in, forced Shinon awake a few hours later. It seemed like someone had come in at some time and covered her a little with a small blanket. She smiled thinking of her caring co-workers. Then she was forced to stay very still. There, on her palm holding the edge of the blanket, was a slightly pale hand...holding hers weakly. Shinon's head followed that hand so fast, she almost broke her neck.

Sure enough, at the end of that arm, was the face that she hoped to see look at her – Renna's face. The sick young woman had a fearful expression on her face as she looked upon her companion's form. "Renna! You are awake. Thank God you are awake. I don't know what I would've done if you didn't wake up soon." Tears began anew. It seemed like it was the day that the great Shinon broke down. It would surely make the history books.

"Shino...I am very sorry for everything – For lying to you and..." Renna was cut off when Shinon stood up, braced both hands carefully on either side of Renna's head and slowly leaning down, Shinon kissed her lightly on the lips. If that tactic never shut up anyone, Renna would want proof of it. Her thoughts were also farther silenced, when a drop of water hit her on the cheek, followed by another and another.

A sight to see indeed. If Dita were to enter the room at that instant, no amount of money could stop her from putting the scene in the news, anywhere. There they were – A patient who had just awoken from a coma, being kissed by the most reserved 'No Romance' girl.

Something was in the air and it wasn't just those damn compacted molecules that stopped heat from escaping – Nope.

After a while, Shinon pulled back and all the poor moon struck Renna could do was just blink stupidly. The pain was forgotten, not that it was any bother, for she was an expert in that area – Duh! She raised her 'free' hand and wiped at the long haired girl's cheeks, at least tried.

She finally got her voice back as she spoke, "Don't let it bother you Renna. I guess I...I somehow knew there was something amiss about you and maybe it was one of the reasons that I always hesitated in coming up to you and talk to you." Renna's eyebrows lifted a bit and a smile formed on Shinon's lips. "Yes Renna, I too have been getting tired of the mail only way. After I heard what had happened to you, all I could think of was that I was losing you without even having talked to you in person. So you see, something as trivial as your case, is nothing now to me."

Renna let out a deep breath and her first tears in...Since when?...Started to flow freely from her less than normally hard eyes. All she could manage to say was, "...Shinon."

"We shall talk some more when you are all better. For now though, you better get some rest."

Renna opened her mouth to let her worries out about her crimes, but Shinon just raised her hand to cut her off with a press of her pinkie on Renna's lips.

"Don't worry about that. They don't know yet and it's really up to you if you want to tell them. I won't say a word if you don't want me to." She saw some doubts in the spy's eyes but she wasn't offended. In the line of work that Renna was in, Shinon somehow knew that trust was the most stupid of things to do.

"My job may have come first before anything, but now, is not then." Shinon assured Renna. "From now and until you wish, you will always come first." The last part was spoken so softly and carefully that you already know what Renna's decision was. The kiss that followed it finalized her decision.

She was Shinon's mail buddy no more. She was Shinon's...Period.

The END


End file.
